


Let's Connect!

by seke



Category: Sarazanmai
Genre: How Do I Tag, M/M, Sexuality Crisis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-03
Updated: 2019-05-03
Packaged: 2020-02-16 08:54:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18688216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seke/pseuds/seke
Summary: Kuji is in love with Kazuki and in denial.





	Let's Connect!

Kuji couldn’t deny that the day he met Kazuki and learned about all that crossdressing stuff, he thought he was a creep. He didn’t know when his feelings changed. But if there was one thing he was sure about was that it didn’t happen in a day or two. It had happened slowly, so slowly it was difficult to remember when he had been in love with him and when that was not the case. But he remembered a few things.

The first one was when he thought maybe Kazuki didn’t look so bad wearing a miniskirt and makeup. Somehow, the lipstick made his lips look…  _ cute. _ It was a shock at first, but Kazuki wasn’t the only person he was knowing better. He was also discovering things about himself that he would never guess; he liked guys, he liked girls, and–he liked those who were both or neither, or that looked like that. And above anything, he liked Kazuki.

The second one was that Kazuki was  _ crazy _ . He didn’t think much about the consequences of the things he did, if they were for his beloved (or so he thought) Haruka. He thought they were similar. Both of them did things to protect their family, their dear brothers. Kazuki was strong and Kuji liked it.

One day, before he knew it, Kuji thought about Kazuki as something more than a friend– _ and they were not friends _ ! He thought he was weird and starting to act like Enta, but in the end, that was just how he was. A boy in love. A gay boy, hopelessly in love.

He wanted to see Kazuki again. He wanted to connect. It was painful. He thought he couldn’t do anything… So he just grabbed his pillow and squeezed it hard, thinking about how to make his feelings  _ stop _ . Even though he knew it was useless.

He thought about simply acting on his feelings, since erasing them was useless, but he didn’t know what to do. He was surprisingly clumsy when it came to love and got shy easily. How could he tell Kazuki how he felt?

In the end, it turned out he didn’t have to do anything. Kazuki himself came to him and told Kuji how he felt; he was in love with him. Kuji didn’t know where it came from. He realized that maybe he wasn’t paying as much attention to Kazuki as he thought he was, as he would never suspect that his feelings were mutual. But he was happy, for a moment.

Then, he became hopeless again. He didn’t know what to do. Could he and Kazuki become a couple? Kuji didn’t know, but he had a feeling they couldn’t. He was, for the first time in years, scared. Scared of letting go and scared of loving too much.

Surprisingly, Kazuki didn’t demand an answer from Kuji; he didn't ask him to do anything. But they both shared the desire of staying close, so that’s what they did.

 

“What are you thinking about, dish~?” Kazuki, dressed as Sara Azuma, asked Kuji, with his eyebrows raised.

They were in a (totally not) date, getting ice cream, since it was the Sara luck item of the day. That was the only reason, they told themselves. 

Kuji, taken aback, couldn’t reply at first.

“I, uh… Nothing.”

“Hm…” 

Kazuki didn’t buy it. He knew Kuji was thinking about something. Sometimes, Kuji thought he could read his mind.

“Right, so why don’t you take a picture of me?”

“Uh, okay.”

“Dish~!”

The picture was taken and they both kept quiet as Kazuki texted Haruka his new selfie. Well, “Sara’s” new selfie.

“Hey, Kuji,” Kazuki started, about to finish texting, not looking Kuji in the eyes. “Wanna share this ice cream?”

“No,” Kuji said without thinking twice. “I don’t like strawberry.”

“Then,” Kazuki said. “We can get another flavor.”

“No need.”

_ Get a hint, Kuji! _ Kazuki thought.

“Ugh, is it too much to ask you for an indirect kiss, dish?!”

Kuji blushed, not expecting to hear that word. Then, he calmed down and said:

“What, do you need to ask?”

He laughed, maybe to hide his nervousness.

“If you want a kiss, come and get it.”

Kazuki let out a deep sigh.

“Just kidding,” Kuji said, before kissing him.

The kiss was nothing more than a touch of the lips, there was no butterflies, no tongues, no rainbows. But still, they both blushed. Kuji had surprised even himself with his boldness. It was embarrassing.

“Cold,” Kuji complained.

“Well, I’m eating ice cream. Of course my lips are going to be cold!”

“... Hmph.”

“Hey,” Kazuki called, not even a minute after. “Can we kiss again?”

“I told you, didn't I?” Kuji said. “You don’t need to ask.”

“Okay.”

That time, Kazuki was the one to kiss Kuji. The kiss was again, short, but in their heart, they felt connected.

“Ah,” Kazuki exclaimed, as he saw his ice cream melting and hitting the floor. “Now I need to buy more ice cream.”

“Haven’t you already taken your picture? Actually, haven’t  _ I  _ taken your picture for you?”

“Yes?” Kazuki replied, not understanding what Kuji was trying to say. “But I want to eat ice cream. After all, this is a date, isn’t it.”

“A date…!” Kuji repeated, with red cheeks.

“Of course! Now let’s buy more ice cream, dish!”

“... Fine.”

Kazuki laughed as he held the hand of an embarrassed Kuji. They were young and he didn’t know what awaited them in the future, but he knew he would treasure every little moment like that. With someone who finally allowed him to be himself.

As they walked around holding hands, Kuji thought the same thing. Kazuki knew about his past. He knew about his  _ present _ and yet, he was with him. He was the only one for him.

He wanted to stay with him as long as he could. He didn’t know how long that would be, but he knew that it would be worth it.

Because they were connected.


End file.
